To many challenges....too little time.

I seem to be going in circles lately trying to keep up with everything in my life. It seems inevitable that something falls through the cracks and as much as I have tried I am still not doing a good job keeping up with the blog challenges so this is once again my pathatic attempt to play catch-up. Thanks to Shandy and Lisa from scrapgal for the inspiration....here it goes.

Challenge #12
Shandy wrote:
Tell us about your NAME! yep, that's right... your name. How did your parents come up with it?... is there a story behind it?.... Do you like your name?... if you could have named yourself, would it have been the same or something different?... just go with it!... no rules! We just want to learn more about ya!

Well my name is Michelle Lee. My Dad grew up in the 60's and was a big Beatles fan. He told my Mom that if I was a girl he wanted to name me Michelle after "My Michelle". My grandmother (maternal) loved the song and the name too, so there it is. It may be unoriginal but I was named after the Beatles song. As far as my middle name goes.....My Dad's 1st name is Lee my Mom's name is Deborah Lee. My Mom thought that was neat. So I was named Michelle Lee and my sister is Tammy Lee. Lee has become a family name for us. My boys are lucky and have been blessed (or cursed depending on how you look at it) with two middle names......Riley James Lee and Aiden John Lee. Lee just had to be in there somewhere!


Challenge #13
Lisa wrote:

"Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get" My challenge to you is twofold 1) Write about what this quote means to you. How have the unexpected moments impacted your life? Do you have a particularily memorable unexpected moment? Do you hate surprises or do you go with the flow? These are just suggestions jumping off points, feel free to go where the quote takes you!

I loved Forest Gump. He always had the best perspective on life and he truely lived up to the motto. For me it just means that in life you are going to be thrown some home run pitches and sometimes you are going to strike out. Life is not meant to be easy, you would be bored, you just strive to make the best of what your given. That's all you can do.

Challenge #14
Webster's Wednesdays! On Wednesdays we will play with words. We will embrace the word. We will celebrate the word. So let's Define our Needs shall we? Because Webster's, after all, is largely about definitions. You thought it was all about the spelling? Or pronunciation? Or origin? Pshawwww So here's how you play the game today. Go to the Google search engine and type in your name and the word needs For Example....Lisa Needs

This one is fun....well according to yahoo......Michelle Needs.......

1. Outcomes.......so true I need to be able to see results to stay motivated!

2. Help.......in so many ways.

3. To win......the Lotto would be nice!

4. Coffee.....someone on yahoo must have seen me at 7 am!!!

5. A "wie" bit of luck.....is there a leprachaun out there who will help me win the lotto or give me his pot of gold? I am Irish after all!

6. To accept.......there are a lot of things in my life I just need to accept but the list is too long.

7. "Sadly Michelle Needs Help" (No literally)....ok ok I can take a hint (yahoo's direct quote), really who out there designing that search engine has a crystal ball pearing into my life?

8. Advice....wasn't that already covered in 2 & 7???

9. A new putter?.......I don't play golf but I am open to learning.

10. Michelle needs to take photography and graphics classes...really it said that....how insightful! I'd love to do both if I only had the time.

-Thanks Lisa this was so fun and uplifting.

Challenge #15...I am really catching up!!! Woot Woot!
TRUTH OR DARE! Here's how we play. I pose a question. You can either choose to answer OR take the DARE! So here we go! TRUTH Have you ever "regifted" a present. If you have, tell us what the gift was, who you gave it to and why the gift was passed on to another person. Was it a hideous velvet Elvis painting? A chia pet? A sweater that was three sizes too large and in a color you'd never wear? Go to your blog and tell us about it. or DARE If you haven't or don't want to answer, go to you blog and tell us about the best gift you ever received and why you loved it. Maybe it was an family heirloom that was passed down to you. Or a special vacation? A handmade piece of pottery from your child? Share with us in your blog post why that gift, out of all the gifts you have ever received in your life is the one near and dear to your heart!

I'll take the dare...I like to live dangerously. I was actually a little suprised myself when I thought about the answer to this one........

A few years back my fil bought me a Mr. Machine off of e-bay. I had told them that it was one of my favorite Christmas toys when I was about 6 and my father in law went out of his way to win a bid on e-bay and gave it

to me for Christmas....It was one of the most thougtful things he has ever done!

Well I feel somewhat like a failure. I was really going to try and keep up with the blog challenges on scrapgal but I just am too far behind. I feel a little overwhelmed. Though I don't want this beautiful blog that Shandy created for me to go to waste.

Easter Memories

We had a nice Easter. The boys had an egg hunt everywhere they went. On Saturday we went to my parents house and after dinner we were clearing the table. My Dad was leaving the dinning room and Aiden was running in and BOOM they ran into each other and Aiden went flying into the corner of the cabinet. He had a HUGE goose Egg and a big bruise down the middle of it. We had to take him to the ER. It looked horrible. He was screaming and my Dad felt horrible!!!! This picture is almost two days later so it looks a little better.

The BIG reveal.......


Ok so how did you do?........

Yes I did have a Pajama Jammy Jam with Kid N' Play. I won a radio contest when I was a sophomore in high school. Me and 50 of my "closest" friends hung out at my house with Pizza and food supplied by the radio station. I have pictures and will try to post later. I also won a stereo, camcorder, and a 32 " TV, which is in my living room right now, amazing I just realized how old it is but it still works great! (knock on wood).


When I was a junior in college one of my sorority sisters (Gamma Sigma Sigma) convinced me to enter the Miss New Britain Pageant, a preliminary to the Miss CT pageant. I did place (My friend won) and my sister who lived in New Jersey was Nannying for a family who owned Gothem City a modeling agency and in exchange for her nannying they assisted he in finding modeling jobs/contracts as a runway/fashion model. It was the only time in my life that I felt for once that it was not just my sister who got all the looks in the family. She continues to be drop dead gorgeous!






Though this is not the best picture!





So to finally let the cat out of the bag......while I have driven over 100 miles per hour on a race track it was not in a race car so for all of you who guessed #2 you are right!

Thanks for taking the time to guess and thanks to Shandy for this wonderful blog challenge......I can't wait to catch up with the other challenges.

For anyone interested in Digital Scrapping I now have a link to Shandy's design page SV Designs....she is ubber talented so please check out her stuff!

Blog Challenge #11

Well Shandy has such an awesome challenge this week I had to skip ahead.

Three statements about myself 2 are true one is false.....boy this could be fun!!

Here it goes........see if you can guess......it'll be tough.......ready....set.....GO....

1.) In high school I had a Pajama Jammy Jam with Kid n' Play two well known hip hop/ rap stars of the late 80's early 90's.
2. ) I once drove a race car on a track at over 100 mph.
3.) I placed in a local beauty pageant in college thanks to tips from my sister who was a runway model in NYC.

OK go ahead guess....I dare you!

Catching Up...

Well first I need to thank a very special person for helping me update my blog and get me on the right track.....Shandy....a really SWASS gal from a scrapping site I am sort-of addicted to created this beautiful header for me and helped me to freshen up my blog space. It now feels more like me. So in return I really need to keep up with it. Shandy and the other awesome women at scrap gal have given me the perfect way to do this. We have a blig challenge going on and right now I am 10 posts behind!!! So getting down to business....

Challenge #1. Finish this sentence; I think......

Well this is an easy one. I think I am pretty lucky to have a wonderful person who was willing to help me create an awesome blog and I think that I am going to have to do something nice for her....haven't figured out what yet but I am brainstorming!!!!

Challenge #2. 10 Things that make me happy.

1. My boys (husband included)
2. Iced Coffee preferably blueberry.
3. A summer breeze at the beach.
4. Family Time
5. Sleeping Late
6. Chocolate
7. New Scrap Supplies
8. Spending time on Scrapgal.com
9. A message
10. Girl Time

Challenge #3. Fad we had to be a part of...

Boy there are soo many over the years...staring with pink Reeboks in 5th grade....yep had to have them and my Guess overalls and my Swatch! I only wish I had a pic to post.

Then there was the beany baby craze.

Um lets see then there was big bangs....then no bangs....then heavy metal music...yep I listened to Metallica (My senior year book quote was "Under wandering stars I've grown by myself but not alone" from a Metallica song) Then their was the rap stage.....Cypress Hill...then the female rocker stage.....Tori Amos, Indigo girls.....boy there are too many to name but it was fun to reminisce!

Challenge #4 What do you do when you are all alone and no one is wathcing?

I sing like I am the best singer there ever was........easy to do when you have no audience!

Challenge #5 Share a link with everyone that you enjoy.

I usually don't surf the web other than scrap sites and for research on autism but I was interested the other day when I was typing away at work to see how fast I could type and I did find this site... www.typetest.com Check it out...I was between 45 and 50 wpm each time. How did you do?

Well 5 Challenges is a start....I will catch up on the other 5 later......right now its close to bed time, so g'night everyone!

A sample of my work....

What to write.......

My blog is more of a personal journal for me.....its how I process what I am feeling...really it is cheap therapy. I don't mean to offend anyone with what I write. I am such a people pleaser that its just not in my nature. Even in my family I have always played the role of mediator.....between my parents when they were (are) fighting with my sister and my parents or me and my sister. I will always admit fault, even if I have none just for the sake of keeping the peace. I know there is a saying out there "you can please some of the people some of the time but you will never please all of the people all of the time."....yeah I know but I try anyway. I think I have a major insecurity in that area. I want people to like me.....and I want people who are around me to be happy. I think that I carry a lot of guilt especially with my boys. I think that they are spoiled because I can't stand to see them sad. I know that its not good and don't get me wrong I do discipline and my kids are pretty well behaved but if they want something and its reasonable I try and get it for them. Anyway perhaps I should stick to a paper and pencil to write down my thoughts.....it's just not the same I guess. If what I write offends anyway I apologize....its really not intentional nor in my nature.....sometimes when feelings get bottled up for so long when they finally come out they just come out wrong. Especially when so much emotional pain is involved. Well I guess this therapy session has comed to an end. I feel somewhat better and really do believe that blogs are theraputic....guess each person's blog is unique and personal to them.....if you use your blog in a similar way I'd love to know.....send me a link.

Reflections

Well, I was really thinking about what I was going to write in my new post.....do I talk about my father-in-laws fall ( he fell and hit his head because of a tumor and is in the hospital) or do I think of something witty to write, like comparing my life to a circus, or do I ramble like I did in my 1st two posts? After much thought and reflection (hence the title of this post) I decided that I needed a pick-me-up so I am reflecting on my life and I will try to practice what I preach here it goes:


I am thinking about the exact moment I am in and what I have in my life (other than a TON of bills and a LOT of stress)

1. A wonderful husband who loves me for who I am and who understands me even when I don't.
2. Two healthy adorable children who press me beyond my limits several times a day but who I can't wait to come home and kiss every night.
3. We have a house, though it may not be galmerous or all that roomy, or have a dishwasher, or more than one bathroom (OK how do I make this a positive?)....it does have a beautiful big back yard, and a playroom for the kids and it is a house and not a condo or apartment and the small space forces us to spend quaility time together. (There I did it... I ended positively)
4. I have career for once in my life and not just a job, and I am feeling more professionally satisfied.
5. I have more bills than I can pay but I have a great husband and two fab kids (I know I said that already but I need to cancel out the stress of the bills somehow)
6. I have a wonderful best friend who is like a sister to me. We can talk about everything, and we can relate to each others lives.
7. I have a sister who is a wonderful listener and who knows all the most deepest darkest secrets of my childhood and the wonderful childhood memories.
8. I have two parents who I love though they try my patience sometimes, though I am sure it is just payback from when I was a kid.
9. Somewhere out there somebodies life is worse than mine.
10. Things can change in a blink of an eye soI need to reflect upon and cherish a moment at a time.
11. When I am feeling a little overwhelmed I will make a list and focus on the things I have not the things I don't have.....like a bigger house or more money......even people who have those things are just as stressed as me....only over something different.

There I feel a little better.........sometimes life is just hard and as mush as I try not to be stressed I just sneaks up on me.

A Day at the Circus

Do you ever feel like you are the ringmaster of a three ring circus? I do.


Ring 1
Juggling Acts:

• Laundry
• Bills
• Cooking
• Patience (the ball that always gets dropped)
• Spending time with the kids.
• Spending time with DH
• House work (other than cooking, laundry and bills!)

Ring 2
Jumping Through Hoops of Fire (other wise know as work)

Hoop 1 making my staff happy and keeping up morale.
Hoop 2 meeting deadlines and filing reports
Hoop 3 keeping my desk organized and with out random piles.
Hoop 4 staying connected to the children I work with (if I make it through the 1st three hoops!)

Ring 3
Walking the tight rope (also known as taking time for myself)

This is the act that I am still trying to figure out.......that tight rope is so damn thin that I keep falling off at:
_____exercising______eating right_______scrapbooking______destressing__


I find that my life is some what overwhelming, and I wonder what kind of ringmaster I truely am.....somedays I barely escape being eaten by the lion of life! I bet Barnum & Bailey would never hire me!!!! Is there a ringmaster school anywhere out there? Random thought of the day..... Children who want to run away and join the circus turn into adults who live the life. Am I even making any sense?

Well I guess its back to circus for me, hope I've made you at least chuckle a bit....hey wait a minute perhaps I can be a clown instead of a ringmaster.....at least my children would have fun!

Well I think I am getting sick, I am tired and congested. My eyes keep watering. It could be that I stayed up until 2 in the morning the last few nights on a really cool website www.scrapgal.com. I am totally into scrapbooking and my New Years resolution was to take more time to myself to persue my hobby. It seems like my dh is always taking the time to drum and I am always playing with the boys or doing something house related.......life's too short. I need more me time. That's my hope for everyone take time to yourself.....well speaking of taking time to yourself I need to go rest, I was on vacation all last week and I can barely see my desk I can't afford to stay home sick from work tomorrow.

TTFN!
Michelle

My first dabble at dribble.

Now I am truly convinced that everyone in the world is overly stressed. I never in a million years thought that I would start my own blog because quite honestly I never thought that my life was very interesting. Now in today's society delving into someone ele's life is an escapism. That is why reality TV is such a hit. No one thought anyone would tune in to watch someone Else's trials and tribulations but the truth is that we will do anything to avoid dealing with our own lives. I admit I love watching "Little People/Big World" on TLC. Its something about becoming part of someone Else's life for that 30 minutes that intrigues me.....its like the nosy neighbor who knows every ones business.

Well anyway here it goes......I live on the east coast somewhere south of Maine but North of Florida......I have a DH and two DSs I work in the human services field as a director of a program working with children who have been committed to DCF. Most of these poor abused children have some sort of autism.....the autistic spectrum has a many forms as the color spectrum has shades of light!!!! I do a lot of behavioral therapy. I love my job and actually was blessed when I was let go from my last job......that's a story for a whole other blog!!!!!! I used to be a preschool teacher and I loved my work but I did not get along with a lazy co-worker who was more interested in gossiping with other teachers and kissing the directors ass to take care of the children in her classroom....so I made waves and unfortunately they came crashing down on me!

Though like I said it was blessing in disguise. One of the reasons that I worked there was my children were able to attend and practically for free (one of the other reasons I believe I was let go.....my children were taking up spots that were costing the director money) but anyway I had a Master's degree in Psychology with a specialization in children and I was working as a head preschool teacher making $12/hr. I loved the families I worked with and the children I cared for but when I was let go it forced me to close one chapter of my life and open the next. After I was let go I found a position working 2nd shift with an agency that worked with abused/neglected children. This gave me the opportunity to be home with my own two wonderful sons (2 & 5) and still work. I had the best of both worlds and we didn't have to pay for day care. I went to work when my husband came home. I even got to enjoy the whole summer with my son who went to kindergarten this past fall. He was crushed at 1st to no longer be able to attend the day-care where he had friends since he was a baby, but he eventually got over it and attended a part-time preschool in our town at his elementary school. He had the absolute BEST teacher......if she could only follow him to college we'd be set. I attribute the fact that he is reading in kindergarten to her.

To be quite honest my husband and I truly believe Daycare ruined my son. He spent 40-45 hours a week on a schedule in a crowded rowdy classroom. Even though he had three teachers in his room 20 kids is way to much......let me tell you if I did not work at the daycare (my director hated when people called it daycare) I would never put my child there......I am sorry but I pity the poor children who at are dragged out of bed in the morning and then made to follow "the routine" all day long......sure there's lots of play and learning going on but at who's pace......anyway enough on that.

I know childcare is a necessity I know have my boys in a home daycare part-time because I took this position as director and my hours changed. Though I still have part of the mornings with my kids and we get to go to playgroup or the library before I go to work....it's great.

In my free time I love to scrap. I am sort of addicted. My husband and I share a spare room on the second floor of our home as a "hobby" room (the other side of the second floor is a huge playroom for our kids) he has his drum set on one side and I have my scrapbooking station on the other side. Nothing elaborate but it works for me. I also love to make jewerly which is a new hobby that just started at Christmas. I went over my girlfriends house for a photo jewerly party. I was dying for a photo necklace with Sworoski crystals but it was over a hundred dollars so I taught myself how to make jewerly and made it myself for $25.00 with Sworoski crystals included, then I made them as Christmas gifts for my mom and mother in-law.


Well enough of my dribble for now I will add more later. I need to go to bed. DH says he can't sleep with out me there and I have been on the computer FOREVER! I will post more soon though I am still not sure anyone is interested in my dribble ( I like that word ) but I have to admit it is theraputic.

TTFN-
Michelle